Kiki's Birthday Delivery

Now that pfeiffer pfestivities have concluded, shall we quickly celebrate the date of birth of one of my absolute favourite young ladies (and I know she's a fave of some you guys, RIGHT?!) Well, Kirsten "Kiki" Dunst turns 24 today. To tide yourself over until the release of what is sure to be one of the most interesting (to say the least, the best to the say the most) films of the year, Sofia Coppola's Marie Antionette, click the banner below to see the new trailer. And she also has a little movie called Spiderman 3 in the works to be released in the 07. Any of y'all heard of it? Apparently it's a sequel. Who knew? Ciao bellas.



Here's a question though - Did Kirsten get the nickname "Kiki" because she voiced Kiki in the english-language version of Miyazaki's Kiki's Delivery Service, by pure virtue of her name or a weird coincidental combination of the two?

Yes, it looks awesome, but will people care?

I like it! But, honestly, after the travesty disasters that were the last 2 Bond movies will anybody give a rat's arse? That is the million dollar question (or, for Sony and MGM, the $150 million question). But, still, I'm liking the design.

How awesome am I?

I just purchased this from eBay. Clearly I rock.



And it was only $35 (inc. postage and insurance) so that is mighty unreal! I can't wait to view the weird and grotesque images that it beholds. After I view this DVD (which includes The Grandmother (which I have already seen), The Alphabet, Lumiere and Company, The Amputee and The Cowboy and the Frenchman but NOT Six Men Getting Sick) my viewing of David's oeuvre will be even closer to completion. They just need to release The Straight Story on DVD, "Rabbits" in any form and his "On The Air" tv series. Oh and, ya know, the second series of a certain television program called "Twin Peaks". I've already seen it but that was on VHS and i'd love to watch it on beautiful DVD. Plus, my friend Hannah loved the first season when I made her stay up all night and watch it and now it's killing her not knowing that Laura Palmer was murdered by... (i'm not that silly). And then I could navigate my way through the movies he's producers, which I haven't seen such as Crumb, Nadja and one I've never heard of before called The Cabinet of Dr Ramirez (the name sounds like a riff on the The Cabinet of Dr Caligari from 1920). He's mentioned to have animated for Does That Hurt You?, another title I'm unfamiliar with but should try to seek out - although it will surely be impossible considering it's a german short animation...

Of course coming up we have Inland Empire coming up - unfortunately, as we all know, it didn't make it on the Cannes list so maybe it won't be a 2006 film?!? So tragic - but that should be great anyway. I'm seeing Hidden on Thursday hopefully and while it has absolutely zero to do with David, it's beginning plot (couple receives mysterious videotapes etc) sounds an awful lot like Lost Highway and I've always wondered what that story idea would turn out like when in the hands of someone else. No Robert Blake I assume. I can't remember whether I've actually seen Six Men Getting Sick? I think I have but...

United 93

So... who else is starting to think Paul Greengrass could find himself with an Oscar nomination for Best Director come next January? After reading some of the reviews for the film it would seem like a logical move if the Academy aren't wanting to be too safe. He wouldn't win (well, i don't think so anyway) but I can see a nomination as a definite possibility. Especially if Oliver Stone's World Trade Center goes down the wrong way and eliminates vote splitting.

In other news, Roger Ebert reviewed Look Both Ways. He gave it 3.5/4 so that's good. Ebert says it's good... WILL YOU SEE IT NOW?! Er, I'm sure you ALL would (heheh) if it were released wherever you live. Right? RIGHT!

!

OMG! I did not hear about that. Shocking.

Beyonce thinks if she were ugly people would respect her more. The world laughts at her, not with her

To play the lead in the film adaptation of the Broadway smash Dreamgirls, Knowles, 24, subjected herself to bushy eyebrows and frumpy suits. The result: Total transformation ("Very not cute," she told reporters) – and a taste of what life might have been like if she hadn't been born beautiful. "To be honest," she said, "I feel people would have acknowledged my talent a lot more."

You've. Got. To be. Kidding. Moi.

If she were frumpy and unfacialed she wouldn't have even been in Destiny's Child and subsequently wouldn't be famous. I still love her, but my god honey, don't delude yourself.

Source

And, also. apparently Terrence Howard is ..up at 4:30 doing 500 push-ups, 1,000 sit-ups and a three-mile run before taking his three kids to school. All I have to say is:

BULL.
SHIT,
TERRANCE.

You are such a liar. And anyone who needs to spend, what? 4 hours? 4 hours of pushups and situps in the morning to feel better is deluded beyond help. I'm thinking... MID-LIFE CRISIS. But, still. 500 push-ups and 1000 sit-ups? No way! I do not believe that for even half a second. The day Terrence shows up at my house and does this in front of my eyes is the day I will believe it. In the mean time I'm gonna continue thinking he is a tosspot that just happens to be a decent actor (remember the days of "Terrance Dashon Howard" lolz)

And "2:37" makes three, Nicole gets hitched + Pfeiffer Pfreakiness

A third Aussie film has been selected for Cannes to play in the Un Certain Regard section. 2:37 by director Murali Thalluri now joins Suburban Mayhem which we've already discussed, as well as Rolf de Heer's upcoming Ten Canoes. The latter film, which I am quite excited about, is the first Australian feature (or, any country's for that matter, obviously) to feature an all aboriginal cast using indigenous language (the Ganalbingu) and features David Gulpilil as the storyteller. I love me some David Gulpilil. He was #77 on the 2000's coundown for his great performance in The Tracker and he was also in Rabbit-Proof Fence amongst many older films like Walkabout. Rolf de Heer has previously made The Tracker, Bad Boy Bubby, The Old Man Who Read Love Stories and Alexandra's Project (Helen Buday, #98, Acting 2000's Countdown) along with a whole bunch more.

--

In news relating to celebrities (my favourite!) Nicole Kidman is goin' to the chapel! Reports say Nic and Keith Urban are getting married in an Australian ceremony in June. It's a bit odd though considering June is Australia's winter. Maybe that's just a thing to get people's noses off the real scent. I find this imminent marriage much more normal than Kidman's ex Tom Cruise and his fiancee Katie. If for no other reason than Nicole and Keith are actually the same age! And it's nice that these two Aussie's are getting married. So... congrats... if it's true!

--

In pfreaky pfeiffer related news! I just went out and got the mail and I pfound I had received a DVD in the mail. I always get excited to pfind out what one if might be and I opened it up and pfound that they send me The Witches of Eastwick which is sort of crazy. I mentioned on Queering the Apparatus (in their Pfeiffer blog issue) that I really wanted to see Eastwick cause I LOVE Pfeiffer and Cher and really like Nicholson and Sarandon. Well... how pfortuitous.

--

Nathaniel over atPfeiffer Blogathon Central posts more Pfeiffer goodies. Go read! After you've read mine of course :p

Michelle Period Pfeiffer Period

This is all part of Nathaniel's Michelle Pfeiffer Blogathon. Hope y'all enjoy. And make sure you read everyone else's. They're bound to be pfreakin' pfantastic pfolks.


Question: Is there anything more exciting than seeing Michelle Pfeiffer covered in delectable costumes? Hmm, probably - but I'm sure it's right up there at the top of natural highs in the world! But where do we start when discussing the beautiful creation that is Michelle Pfeiffer with the added extra of costumes? Does my mind go to the head-to-toe early century duds from The Age of Innocence and Dangerous Liaisons (both of which won Academy Awards for said costumes. Pfeiffer lucky charm.) Or does it swing to the fantastical recreation of Catwoman in Batman Returns. Or do we go for something contemporary for equally ravishing such as THAT red dress in The Fabulous Baker Boys. Oh… too much sensory excitement.


As the steadfast Madame Marie de Tourvel in Stephen Frears’ Dangerous Liaisons Michelle walks around a whole lot looking gorgeous (it comes easy to her you see), constantly wrapped in costumes that are a veritable cornucopia of beautiful duds. It helps that the Pfeiff is stunning in the role (later made famous to the youngens of my generation through Reese Witherspoon in Cruel Intentions, y’all.) This era in time always has the best costuming, and seeing Michelle (and everyone else for that matter, including Glenn Close, John Malkovich and Uma Thurman) in them is heavenly.


However, my favourite of Michelle’s two big costume dramas is Martin Scorsese’s The Age of Innocence, playing wily minx Ellen Olenska. It helps when the people inside the delicious costumes are pretty and HOLD THE FREAKIN’ FORT. Has there ever been a more attractive screen couple of the Pfeiff and Daniel (all-)Day-(long-)Lewis as the couple who just can’t quite get there. In this film Michelle is dressed up with a lot of places to go. She wear’s sexy ball gowns for the opera, beautiful outfits for just lounging around the house entertaining guests, and then there are all those pretty hats for protecting her fragile beautiful face from the sun!


In the picture above (from Innocence) you will notice she is wearing a gorgeous deep-red dress and as we all know, she is ravishing red, but where else has Michelle looked HOTTER than in The Fabulous Baker Boys? Dressed in that slinky red number, sitting atop of Jeff Bridges’ piano singing “Makin’ Whoopee”. If you have seen this movie (and I hope you have) you will agree with me that she’s never been better. But no matter what sexy li’l cocktail dress director Steven Kloves puts her in she looks great. Her Susie Diamond is a STAR, baby! The fact that What Lies Beneath director Robert Zemeckis decided to revisit Susie Diamond by putting Michelle in another sexy red dress just goes to show how great it really was.


And then there is that vixen of villains, Catwoman. Michelle slips on what could arguable be called one of the most dangerously erotic outfits ever in a movie to play the purring jewel thief. So much black leather! Selina Kyle would never have dreamt of such a concoction. What makes Michelle so sexy in this outfit is her demeanour. She has so much confidence in this costume that she makes it work despite being completely incomprehensibly inappropriate. But whatever, it’s awesome!


To finish this little article without mention of her sexy mob outfits from Scarface (including another sizzling red/pink number), or her business attire in I Am Sam, or the Russian garb from The Russia House? I don’t think I could’ve. Or how about her homicidal serial killer prison chic in White Oleander? That leather jackets and high school hyjink of Grease 2 and Dangerous Minds (at completely different ends of her acting spectrum)? Uh-huh. She went fantasy (but I have not seen it) in Ladyhawk and is going to be similarly dressed in the upcoming Stardust. You can pretty much be assured that no matter what outfits Michelle Pfeiffer steps into, she’ll look her absolute best. How could she not though, she is one of the most beautiful women on the planet. Someone really needs to cast her in another period piece. She might get that Oscar she deserves, and the costumes she looks best in.


There we go, I hope you enjoyed this Michelle Pfeiffer costume retrospective and hope you enjoy everyone else's different discussions about La Pfeiffer. She is one of the greatest actresses ever put on this planet. Happy Birthday Michelle (lol, as if you're actually reading this). Please keep acting and looking fabulous.

Bangs!

Tom Cruise: "I TRIMMED MY BANGS WITH A FLOWBIE!"

Keri Russell: "Way to totally eff up my big blockbuster summer movie role, MAVERICK. I hate your stupid fucking girl bangs. I can't even look at you."

Jonathan Rhys Meyers: "Well, this is awkward."

Brilliant.


DON'T LOOK AT ALL THE BULGING VEINS IN MY NECK. I mean it. Don't look at them, Felicity. I will eat your placenta. I mean it.

Am I the only one who's mind, upon seeing Tom in that picture, immediately went to Olivia Newton-John in Grease? lol, probably. Tom is not the one that I want though. He's gross and weird and anyone who eats placentas and umbilical cords (because they're nutricious, obviously) is screwed up.

Hotness Goodiebag - Alex O'Loughlin

Nat got me thinking that none of y'all (well, except the few Aussies) will know who ALEX O'LOUGHLIN is. He steamed up the screen in Oyster Farmer (ample opportunities to see him sans shirt) and has been in a couple of other things I haven't had the chance to see. Hopefully he explodes in the non-literal sense and becomes our next big thing. Unfortunately for you there's barely any pictures of him on the net, so you'll have to do with these small collection that doesn't really show up that much of his hotness. But hopefully you can see the hotness within. He's got a Hugh Jackman thing going on methinks, which is a-okay in my books. :P


(click for larger version)

Happy National Secretary Day!

Actually, it was yesterday, but how is that going to stop me from making a list of my 10 favourite secretaries and assistants?! Me? NOT do a list? You've got to be joking. The funny thing about this list? Half of these are bad at their job, but that's why we love 'em.

1. Dolly Parton as Doralee Rhodes in 9 to 5 (1980)

2. Megan Mullally as Karen Walker in "Will & Grace" (1998-2006)

3. Kimmy Robertson as Lucy in "Twin Peaks" (1989-1990)

4. Janet Leigh as Marion Crane in Psycho (1960)

5. Michelle Pfeiffer as Selina Kyle in Batman Returns (1992)

6. David Spade as Dennis Finch in "Just Shoot Me!" (1997-2003)

7. Annie Potts as Janine Melnitz in Ghostbusters (1984)

8. Chloë Sevigny as Jean in American Psycho (2000)

9. Maggie Gyllenhaal as Lee Holloway in Secretary (2002)

10. Jennifer Tilly for voicing Celia Mae in Monsters, Inc. (2001)

Cultural Insensitivity Returns...

Okay, so it's not Memoirs of a Geisha but this is REALLY bugging me. this article is discussing the new Michael Hutchence biopic that is being made (with the assistance of Michael's family). All the way back in January I made that post about the fact that there should be a Michael Hutchence biopic made, and so it appears they are doing one but apparently they want, get this, JOHNNY DEPP to play Michael! Now, this wouldn't be so bad but again it's just annoying because, simply put, there are Australian who could play this role. Apparently they want a highly Australian/British cast (he married the British Paula Yates, remember) yet they're gonna stuff Johnny fuckin' Depp in there?


In the post I linked to up there I said Noah Taylor should play him and I still think that. It's not like Noah Taylor is a bad actor. And they look sort of similar. Michael wasn't movie star pretty and while I know Depp can uglify himself I just can't see him as Michael. I wouldn't even care if someone like Daniel Day-Lewis were to play him, but Johnny Depp just reeks of "BIG NAME!!!" Ugh. Unless he does a Renee Zellweger/Bridget Jones thing (and that's less annoying because it's fictional for some reason), then...

Oh well, it can't be as bad as Memoirs of a Geisha, right?

This Week in Australian Cinemas

I just finished an assignment (comparing Mulholland Drive and Paris, Texas in terms of dialogue, character development and point of view, lol). So it's time for the every-Thursday feature where I show you how rediculous Australian distributers are! To be honest though, we're not terribly behind the ball this week. We get one movie that came out last week in the states, one from February, two that came out at Christmas and an Aussie feature. So WAY TO GO DISTRIBUTERS! You're only, what? 4 and a half months behind in some cases. Swell. Unfortunately for us none of them look good apart from some macabre stupifying death mongering, and even that...


Yes, even the cast of Final Destination 3 are scared of American Dreamz!

Final Destination 3 - Directed by James Wong
Confession - I LOVE Final Destination 2. It ditched all sensibilities and seriousness of the first one (also a wonderfully kooky movie) and just went for balls-to-the-wall gruesome hilarity, and it succeeded in spades. The scene on the highway in FD2 is classic, seriously! And so now we have a third in the oddly titled series (I won't go into how it can the third, yet still final destination even if the first was also meant to be the final one) directed by the man who inbetween directing the first and third installments of this franchise made the execrable The One (I rated it F). I won't be seeing this movie in the cinema, but like the other two I will see it on DVD and most likely enjoy it. It's sorta funny watching annoying stock characters die in truly inventive ways. Until then I can go watch the highway scene on Final Destination 2 on DVD.

American Dreamz - Directed by Paul Weitz
Ummm... I was moderately interested by this movie (it came in at around #80 on my 2006 look) but since seeing the material I can't say I became enthused. Mandy Moore looks a treat as always ("i'd rather stick toothpicks in my eyes than loose" (or whatever the direct quote is) is funny) but the rest..? Yeah, we know Dubya is an idiot, we know Idol competitions are fixed. Blah blah. It seems like Paul Weitz trying to be an adult (like About a Boy) and a teenager (like American Pie) and failing miserable. How odd that out of three films, two have "American" in the title?

The White Countess - Directed by James Ivory
I'd be more excited about this if had gotten some awards attention. Add to that a critical mauling by some (including David Stratton) and I can't say I'm excited at all. The techs looks good but that's about it. "Dull as Dishwater" comes to mind.

Lost and Found - Directed by David Blake
This is an ultra-low-budget Aussie feature from first time writer-director-producer-(yes)distributer David Blake. It's about a man who starts have visions of himself committing excessively violent acts towards other people. Apparently it's not very good (the budget restrictions are obvious) but Brett Climo is good in the lead. Well done to Blake for being able to get this into several high-end cinemas but much like last year's The Magician I don't see this generating anything except maybe a small tiny profit on DVD. Shame really cause it's got Rebecca Gibney in it, who's awesome. But why is FRANKIE J HOLDEN here? Like... what?

Statistics, Part II

Movie With the Most Performances on the Countdown:
3
Moulin Rouge! - 7, 44, 82
Lantana - 9, 35, 45
Brokeback Mountain - 8, 24, 48
Ghost World - 54, 78, 80
2
Requiem for a Dream - 6, 76
American Psycho - 10, 41
Billy Elliot - 11, 19
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind - 14, 33
Dancer in the Dark - 15, 29
Kill Bill - 16, 40
Far From Heaven - 20, 39
Erin Brockovich - 27, 69
Little Fish - 31, 73
Lost in Translation - 36, 53
Closer - 52, 93
The Royal Tenenbaums - 66, 88
thirteen - 90, 96

Actor With Most Performances on the Countdown:
5
Nicole Kidman - 2, 5, 7, 74, 91
4
none
3
Cate Blanchett - 32, 73, 92
Scarlett Johansson - 53, 78, 81
2
Joan Allen - 4, 87
Patricia Clarkson - 23, 39
Renee Zellweger - 42, 67
Jake Gyllenhaal - 48, 56
Clive Owen - 52, 63
Reese Witherspoon - 55, 83
Natalie Portman - 85, 93

The Best of 2005

My second favourite Melbourne Cinema (aka, CinemaNova) says The New World and Cache (going by the name Hidden out here) are both released next week (May 4). So on May 4 next week I will take the 1 hour train ride up there and see these two movies and then and only then will I feel comfortable to post my Best of 2005. I thought Hidden was out at the end of May and that was too long, but if it's out next week then that's good. Neither of these movies will make it to my city (still annoying considering that my city is the second most populated city in the state) so I have to go to Melbourne.

I love going up to Melbourne to see movies. Sometimes I go by myself, other times I go with my friend Hannah who is the only one who would see those sorta movies with me. But Hannah will have school on Thursday and is poor so she won't be able to go. Oh well. I'm very protective of my friends' movie watching. I pretty much have authority over everything they watch and tell them whether it is alright to watch it. I don't think Hannah would like Hidden much (althought she might, but I wouldn't wanna risk it) and I'd rather her get acquainted to Terrance Malick before spending money on The New World.

Still, that didn't stop them from hiring this movie while I wasn't present and watching it in the company of others. It's called The Devil's Arithmetic and I haven't read anything about it, but my friends said it was has Kirsten Dunst and Brittany Murphy TRAVELLING BACK THROUGH TIME TO THE HOLOCAUST! And speaking in modern day American accents too, apparently. Hannah said it was hands down the worst movie she has ever seen and everyone else thought it was awful to. Can't say it sounded too promising.

Anyway, I'm gonna go watch another movie *he says as he avoids watching the rest of Intolerance*

Cabaret Revisited

Cabaret (1972, dir. Fosse)

I originally saw Cabaret a couple of years back and didn't like it THAT much. I liked it, but just not as much as I had hoped. I was at the videostore today and I had a coupon for 7 weekly DVDs for $6.95, which is deliriously cheap! And I needed one more and was in the classic section (look to the sidebar to see what others I got, it's gonna be GREAT!) and saw it and decided I'd give it another go because I hate the fact that I've been going through life not liking it as much as I feel I should.

So I watched it tonight and... WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED?!?! I must have been really tired last time I watched or something because, really... this is brilliant. Maybe because I was watching a VHS copy I just couldn't see it? I have no idea, but this movie is excellent. I fell in love with Liza Minelli's performance, and Joel Grey's was still great. Michael York continues to horrify me with his blandness but even he didn't piss me of as much as last time.

And I really noticed the stunning cinematography this time. I love Bob Fosse directed musical numbers. How he pushes stuff to the background (people walking infront of the camera and so forth) it just adds so much to it. The musical numbers were all outstanding this time instead of only a few. "Mein Herr" and "Money Money" were still my favourites though as they were before.


Man, i loved it. Live is a cabaret alright! A

Top 100 Statistics

STATISTICS
Performances by Year:
2000 - 17
2001 - 23
2002 - 15
2003 - 17
2004 - 16
2005 - 13

Not very surprising. 2001 was the best year for cinema definitely so it makes sense for it to have the highest total. Ditto for 2005 having the lowest. Although I thought maybe 2004 would have more because that was my second favourite year of the 2000's but... apparently not. As well, I included Uma Thurman in both 2003 and 2004, hence, the tally equals 101. Daryl Hannah is only in there for Kill Bill, Vol 2 though in 2004.

Performances by Actor Nationality:
American - 52
Australian - 21
British - 17
Canadian - 1
Chinese - 1
French - 3
Icelandic - 1
Mexican - 1
Persian - 1

Well, that was gonna be a given. And if I did it by nationality of film (er, which I will below) then it'll be even more Americanised. Blah. I was going by what an actor is identified as. Natalie Portman was born in Israel but she's considered American. There's a few others like that. Fact - 7 of the Top 10 performances were by Aussies, however, only 3 were from Australian films (Lantana, Moulin Rouge! and Japanese Story). Only Allen and Burstyn are American and Bale is a Brit.

Performances by Film Nationality:
America - 63
Australia - 15
Britain - 14
Denmark - 3
Spain - 2
France - 1
China/Hong Kong - 1
Poland - 1

I just went with the most obvious nationality for a movie. As many movies have many nationalities. Some seem for BRITISH than others.

Random Junk:
Number of Oscar Winners - 7

From 24 chances, that's quite a sad number!

Male Performanced - 33
Female Performances - 67

I've always said I prefer female actors to male ones. They usually get more interesting roles, because so many women are so different. A lot of the males portrayed in movies aren't that spectacular or different to one other, thus, not distinguishing themselves.

I'm gonna go eat dinner now and watch "Thank God You're Here".

This whole thing was very fun! Hope you enjoyed it to! Ciao

The 100 Best Performances of the 2000's - #1

1. NAOMI WATTS AS BETTY ELMS/DIANE SELWYN IN MULHOLLAND DRIVE (2001)

I'm not going to say much about this one. In fact, I'm going to leave it at a mere single word.

Perfection

And with that, the countdown is complete. I am about to do another entry with stats and all that fun stuff, so enjoy. For now, bask in the wonderment that is Naomi Watts in David Lynch's Mulholland Drive.

Holla From the Other Side - Alida Valli

That beautiful woman from The Third Man died today at the age of 84. Read more about it here. The Third Man is a true unmistakable all-time favourite of mine. In that film she went by "Valli" only, as she did in many other films. Unfortunately I haven't seen any of the other films the article mentions such as Senso, the Bernardo Bertulucci movies or Argento's Suspiria although I really do.

The 100 Best Performances of the 2000's - #2

2. Nicole Kidman as Grace in Dogville (2003)

Nicole Kidman has been everywhere this decade (so far) and nowhere was she finer than in Lars Von Trier's masterpiece Dogville as a mafia daughter fleeing her father through the Rockys and setting up stump in the town at the end of the road - Dogville.

When I saw this film it hit me like a sack of bricks. I wasn't expecting this. And while the fair share of that is because of Lars, Nicole does a lot of heavy lifting herself. It's fascinating, in a slightly disturbing sort of way, to watch Nicole in this movie. I can't help that feel that by the time Grace is walking around with the tire with almost no life left inside her that Nicole too had a similar feeling. And that by the big finale showdown with her father (James Caan) she just wants to vent some fuckin' anger!

And how about that finale, ey? The third act finale is just amazing to watch. Seeing Nicole and James go tit for tat in a battle of the minds about life, violence and vengeance. "Dogs only obey their own nature, why shouldn't we forgive them" (who thinks that was written by Lars as much about America as it is a hit to his critics? I do) Watching Nicole, in these moments quickly losing her downtrodden shyness and become a (sorry, spoiler) a coldblooded killer.

No matter what you think of the film (anti-american bile or stunning masterpiece or whatever in between) I can't see how you can fault Kidman as she makes the role of Grace completely her own (which has come back to bite Lars AND Bryce Dallas Howard in the arse). The way she sinks her voice back (even moreso than in Birth and wonderfully decides to remain hidden (performance wise) is something that not many actresses would do. In other hands, Grace may have been a Jennifer-Aniston-esque-staring-depressionado, but here in such capable understanding hands it becomes a marvellous study in understated acting prowess. And it feels like a fitting way to cap off the list... if it weren't for one of Nicole's own best friends.

What?

From the IMDb

Hoffman Relocating To Australian Theatre

Academy Award-winner Philip Seymour Hoffman is heading to Australia to direct a play written by Cate Blanchett's husband Andrew Upton. The Capote star will set up home in Sydney during his collaboration with the Sydney Theatre Company next year. While the actor is holding back on details, he was recently spotted in the audience of Upton and Blanchett's joint production of Hedda Gabler at the Brooklyn Academy of Music in New York City. Hoffman says, "We're in talks with Andrew Upton and that theatre company and hopefully it's going to happen. Well, I'd rather not get into that as of now, just out of respect for them. I'd rather have them announce it."

Scissor Sisters!

Arjan reports on the Scissor Sisters performance that KYLIE MINOGUE went to (and apparently Cher). Can't wait for their new album. They're awesome.

The 100 Best Performances of the 2000's - #3

3. Toni Collette as Sandy Edwards in Japanese Story (2003)

What can I say? The greatest performance of all-time in an Australian film? Well, from the (admittedly, not HUGE) experience with Aussie films I've had I'd definitely go out on a limb and say that. I can't even precisely put my finger on what it is that makes it so phenomenal. It just IS.

The first half (more like two thirds if I am remembering correctly) of the film is as quietly unnasuming little road movie with a late addition of romance with the Japanese man, played by Gotaro Tsunashima, that Toni's Sandy has been assigned to show around the desert region. But them BAM - a sudden plot twist completely wipes the rug from under your feet and Toni, along with it, peels back about 20 layers at once to form a raw and truly astonishing performance. I don't even know how she did it. It's one of those things that when the movie is over you sit there speechless. What did I just see? Brilliance.

People may not think the first two thirds of the film are that good - hell, even I wasn't that enthused about it (that bizarre pants sex scene omg!) but once the movie has completed you appreciate it so much more. The performance by Collette wouldn't have been as powerfully effective as it was without the rest of it. In fact, Japanese Story acts as a classic ballad. You don't start a ballad at 10. You start lower and then slowly build up and then you hit the 10 with all you got. That's exactly what Collette and director Sue Brooks do. They start slow and get you into a groove and then when they're ready and shake you up and show you what they're really made of.

The performance won every possible award in Australia and rightfully so. Naturally though the release got bungled everywhere else and resulted in it getting swept under the rug come awards season. But as is the mantra around this neck of the woods, the performance is reward enough as it is.

(I just typed out a whole paragraph and realised that it totally spoiled the last third of the film. So with that I'll just say that if you're a fan of Collette, seeing this movie is a must. I doubt she will ever get this good again.)

...to be continued...

The 100 Best Performances of the 2000's - #4

4. Joan Allen as Terry Ann Wolfmeyer in The Upside of Anger (2005)

It should come as no surprise to read that writer and director of The Upside of Anger wrote the role of viciously bitter alcoholic Terry Ann Wolfmeyer especially for the glorious Miss Allen. You can tell that he is a fan of the lady and wrote directly to her strengths as well as creating things that we never knew Joan could do. The ability to mine deep mourning and sorrow. The ability to turn a somewhat unlikable (somewhat?) character into a delicious vixen. The ability to twist dialogue on her lips and turn it into hilarity. All there. This instantly became my favourite Joan performance, beating out her beautiful turn in Pleasantville as a colourful (in the literal sense) 1950s housewife.

Like that 1998 performance, her go in Upside was similarly criminally robbed of an Academy Award nomination. Odd that they could dishonourably forget her. If ever there was an example of the "The Academy don't remember anything before November" argument THIS is it. The Academy (and HFPA and the SAG and...) were simply put NOT. DOING. THEIR. JOB. And that is nominating and rewarding the best performances of the given year. That this performance was beaten out by the likes of Ziyi Zhang Memoirs for a nominations at many places was baffling.

The dinner scene with her daughter's fiance's family warrented a nomination, and the rest earned her the win. "I need a bloody mary and soon as humanly possible". That scene and the many others throughout the film are just ripped through by Joan. She tears through them like a bull in a china shop. "Oh no no, I'm done toasting, I'm just ordering another drink!" *waves glass* - priceless.

But Joan doesn't just make Terry hilarious. She makes her sexy too. And for a woman of her age, she can certainly bring all the boys to the yard to quote Kelis (*ding*). So many actresses probably would have wanted to play her as a dowdy ol' housewife. Has any role required an actress to wear a sleeping gown for so much of the movie?

But what it all comes down to is that Joan is spectacular here, in career-best form and is clearly having a ball throwing out these hilarious one-liners and sideward glances. I thank Joan for giving us Terry Ann Wolfmeyer. She is a true (in my eyes) classic character. As is Joan... just, ya know... she's real. Don't you find that a tad odd?

^
|

That wasn't a question, but a quote from the movie... remember? Or are you like the Academy and don't remember that far back? ;)

...to be continued...

Aussi duo bound for De Niro's Tribecca

The creative duo, who are both actors and wrote and star in the film, have worked on Burke and Wills for more than two years, sinking their life savings of $25,000 into the project.

They had all but given up on the film before it was selected to screen at this year's Tribeca, which runs from April 25 to May 7.

Good for them. Although, to be honest, it sounds like another one of those low budget Aussie movies that look ugly and aren't about much but feature people being loud, *waves at Teesh & Trude.

God, Teesh & Trude was bad.

SOS

I'm an hour into DW Griffith's Intolerance... somebody help me. PLEASE.

Another week, another failed Australian US release!

First they massacred Wolf Creek with an abysmal advertising campaign and truly disastrous release patern (Christmas Day?!?) Then they somehow completely bungled Little Fish (how exactly?) and then they astonishingly decided that Look Both Ways needed a quick mercy killing (That film's distinct Austra'inism didn't help it, obviously), then they straight-to-DVDed The Proposition. Now this week you got the very belated release of Somersault (released here two years ago) and it debuted to very blah results (although it's per theatre average was a decent $4,300).

It doesn't help that these films get picked up by low-to-bottom-of-the-barrel distributers who obviously don't seem to care. Shame really because there's some good films in that bunch. Look Both Ways is definitely the best Aussie film since 2002's Rabbit-Proof Fence (which was also telling a very Australian story yet Miramax managed to get it to $6.1mil off of mild awards heat and Phillip Noyce's name).

I hope you guys try and seek out these movies on DVD as they're all good. I'd even suggest seeing The Proposition even though I didn't like it. I think Oyster Farmer is out there soon so that's another one that will die, but that deserves better. :(

The Best 100 Performances of the 2000's - #5

5. Nicole Kidman as Anna in Birth (2004)

Cold? Yes. Stoic? Uh-huh. Slightly distant? Yup. Am I describing Nicole Kidman (or, the view some people have of her - not me) or Anna in Birth? The woman whose husband died and now he apparently is not. That's the beauty. It's as if Nicole knew what people say about her and channelled it all into this portrayal of a woman who is those exact things and more. With her hair tucked under a Mia-Farrow-esque wig and stuck inside a Kubrickian Eyes Wide Shut apartment (it's not surprise to learn that director Jonathan Glazer's idol is Kubrick) Nicole seems like the cold icy woman that people play her up to be. He stare looks menacing at times, as if being possessed.

That the film itself is a beautiful mindfuck also plays into it. Harris Savidas' camera work and especially Alexandre Desplat's music score only add to the macabre fairytale feel of it all. And Nicole is the icing on the cake. Her whisperish voice fits the role perfectly - a woman who has felt her husband with her all the time, so she speaks in hushed tones.

That the role got completely ignored except for a Golden Globe nomination is a travesty(although, the same could be said for everyone else in the top 5, unfortunately). I suppose it's one of those films that you either get or your don't. Nicole is just simply amazing as the haunted Anna. However, there was one bit that sealed the deal for me and it is a very deceptively simple moment. Anna arrives at the Opera and sits next to her new fiance. She looks up at the stage and the camera remains lingering on her face as it takes up the entire frame for 2 whole minutes without a single cut away. You can see Nicole working through so much without every saying a word and barely any movements. That's acting.

...to be continued...

My Three Favourite Female Comedians

1. JUDITH LUCY

2. MARGARET CHO

3. KITTY FLANAGAN


Judith Lucy is so hilarious. She was on the Melbourne Comedy Festival tonight. Just hiiiilarious. "It looks like your vagina swallowed something and it's trying to get out!" I couldn't breath after that joke.

Excited? Me?

Oh. My. God. !!!.

This is gonna get uuuuugly! Have you read that stuff about Denise Richards and Charlie Sheen? Holy crap! If that's even half true then she aughta chuck his arse out. Drugs, prostitutes, paedophelic pornography (both girls and guys), eratic behaviour, abortions, internet sex search sites, gambling, violence, abuse and DEATH THREATS.

There are sixteen pages of court documents on that link up there. Jesus. If Denise Richards shows up dead sometime soon I think we'll have another OJ/Robert Blake on our hands. (is it morbid that that is what I'm thinking about?). "Respondant also displayed what I can only describe as an abnormal fascination with Nicole Simpson's death and showed my mother and I her autopsy photographs"


(it also sounds like a killer biopic, right?!)

$$$

Ritchie Rich is on tv right now. I loved that movie so much when I was younger. I wouldn't have a clue as to my feelings about it now though. But that was back in the day when Macauley Culkin wasn't a disgusting weirdo freak. Strange coincidence? Home Alone 2 was also on tv just two nights ago. I L-O-V-E that movie NOW. It so great. *avoids rocks and stones* Although why they aired it in April is beyond me (it ain't Christmas).

The 100 Best Performances of the 2000's - 10-6

Here we go, the first half of the Top 10. I've thought about this long and hard. Chopping and changing. The top 4 has been definite for some time now though, it's just the rest that's been tricky. However, I think I have come up with a listing that I am happy with, and I hope you guys are too. Here we go.


10. Christian Bale as Patrick Bateman in American Psycho (2000

What can I say about this performance? It was until recently what I considered to be the greatest male performance of the 2000's, however now this extremely talented (and extremely sexy) Brit will have to make do with being the second (yes there are only 2 men in the top 10). If I were to do a best males of the 2000's like Nathaniel is doing this man would be in the top 10 for sure. This performance just amazes me every time I watch it. It's like he and [American Psycho director] Mary Harron became so intuned with each other that both the performance and the film fed off one another. I like to imagine that it was the film's controversial subject matter and bad release date that made it a virtual no-show in the awards season. But as they say, the reward is in the performance itself.

9. Kerry Armstrong as Sonja Zat in Lantana (2001)

This is the highest ranking for a performance that I would label "supporting" however I can definitely see why it was nominated for (and won!) all the Best Actress awards in Australia (over Nicole Kidman no less) for this performance. It's one of those tightrope performances that stands on the fence of being supporting and lead. I chose supporting because the cast of this film is so large (Vince Colosimo and Daniella Farinaci were #103 and #105 resptively) that I feel apart from Anthony Lapaglia everyone was supporting everyone else. Now to the performance itself... stunning is one word. Fragile is another. The way Armstrong grabs the dialogue and fully creates this character of a suspicious yet worn down wife is amazing to watch. Take the scene between her and Barbara Hershey (who plays a therapist) where she discusses how much she likes being her age, and the lines around her face. The way her voice goes when she says it would be Leon not telling her about an affair that would hurt more than the act itself. Or take the moment when she finally gets the nerve and says the best line of dialogue I heard in a long time:

"You know what's so easy, Leon? It's so easy to go out and find somebody. You know what's hard? What's hard is not to."

8. Heath Ledger as Ennis Del Mar in Brokeback Mountain

The fact that this performance got so usurped during this past Oscar season is what hurt. I can understand Heath losing the big one but how do you explain him losing every single major award? Most of the time from the critics who said he was as good as Brando and all that. I suppose they much prefer a performance screams PERFORMANCE (don't get me wrong. Phillip Seymour Hoffman was #58 remember?). How Ledger digs so deep for this portrayal gets me. His Ennis isn't a man who was loved and lost, but one who never really loved at all and can't forgive himself for it. Don't get me wrong, he "loved" Jack, but he could never let himself get to close to anyone. The moment that really sealed it for me was when he collapsed on the roadside into Jack's arms. "You made me this way". Ouch. So powerful. The male performance of the 2000's!

7. Nicole Kidman as Satine in Moulin Rouge! (2001)

The French... are glad to... die for love... her first words are not without irony. Much like Diane Lane a few spots behind at #11, I believe the real reason this performance is so good is because Nicole grabbed ahold of it full throttle and devoured every ounce of it as if her life depended on it. As if it's a force of nature blowing away everything in it's path including everyone else on screen (the reason why Ewan McGregor was so low was due to the comparison to Kidman, sorry). Yes, her voice isn't the strongest (but it's far from even minor descriptors as "passable" or "decent"), but when she has to she goes for it with that force again and you feel it, which is more than you can say about a lot of other performances.

6. Ellen Burstyn as Sara Goldfarb in Requiem for a Dream (2000

I mentioned in my little bit about Bjork that that movie makes me cry every time. Well, so does this one but it is the moment when Sara's friends see her for in the clinic that does me in and then when they are seated outside and the one friend just starts crying. It's a profoundly sorry moment in a shocking picture. I am not terribly big on Ellen's career, I have seen a few of her big performances but not that many (and unfortunately not Alice) but what we have here is a bonafide career-defining performance. It's like her entire career was leading up to this one point. That Julia won the Oscar doesn't irk me as much as some people (she was #27 on this list after all) but I really do think Burstyn deserved it. What Burstyn does is go above and beyond the call of duty. By the time her friends arrive at the clinic and see her depreciated by electro-shock, her skin pale and her hair chopped off you feel that you are one of those friends seeing her and getting the shock of your life. I will always respect Burstyn because of thise performance as it is truly one of the best I have ever seen.

...to be continued...

Yes, the next five performance are the ones I deemed the best of the current decade. What do I have in stall for you guys? You will see as I reveal them one-by-one. As I said up there there are no more men left in this countdown and it's down to only 5 lucky ladies (or, four?). Who will come out on top? Will the results actually surprise anyone. Find out over the next day... Ciao!