Don't Stop The Links

Online music bible PopJustice quite literally has a list of 100 things that aren't as good as Rihanna's new CD. The list of 100 things that Good Girl Gone Bad (which I thought was a bit of alright) is better than includes: "Trees", "The last Rihanna album", "The rare sight of a sheep sprinting across a field and jumping over a small stream", "The sight of a small child throwing themselves on the floor in the supermarket because they are not allowed a Kinder Surprise", "The last Beyonce album", "Seeing someone almost trip over in the street then pretending they meant to do it with some sort of elaborate and completely unconvincing cover-up", "Scotland", "Shower curtains", "Getting quite a good grade for an essay you knocked out in fifty minutes while coming down from a four-day-long drugs binge", "Shelves", "Bathroom radios in the shape of dolphins which don't really get any reception and take three batteries when you only ever have two lying around because you bought a packet of four batteries and EVERYTHING ELSE EVER INVENTED uses two batteries" and "Lampshades". It's pretty much all true. I now love the Ne-Yo duet, which is something I never thought I've ever imagine possible.

Scott over at Scott, To Be Certain has faith in Kelly Clarkson. "Never Again" is really kind of quite dull, but even though the album cover does look sort of like Amy Lee's own private fancy dress party, it is artsy and purdy and, well, let's face it, Kelly is so much better than Amy Lee who isn't exactly where it's at.

The Hollywood Reporter has the nominees for the Key Art Awards. They are the only awards group, as far as I know, that gives out awards for marketings. There are some great posters and trailers nominated. Although why the Devil Wears Prada's trailer wasn't nominated can be explained easily (it's just the opening scene, basically), you also can't deny how effective it was (everyone wanted to see the movie immediately after watching it).

Hmmm. Clearly the winner of the Best Drama Poster category will be Hard Candy because, let's face it, that poster was about as amazing as finding something at the charity op shop for a fiver and then going on Antiques Roadshow and discovering it's actually worth, like, 100 times that much and then you get to do that face that they all do. You know the one. The mix of "wow, who cares if this is a family heirloom, I just made a thousand bucks" and "oh, yes, that's about what I expected."

I share Ja's immense pain: You can locate such pain here, here, here, here and, well for some it's more a pain in their pants, but here too. Kristen is yummy. (please, nobody mention any spoilers though!)

I continue to be a firm believer that Brangelina have been replaced by hideous wax robots (picking up all those adopted babies must have made Ange's arms really skinny, right?). I wish they wouldn't compare Brad to Robert Redford. Cause, seriously.

So, in Box Office Prophets entertaining Monday Morning Quarterback segment they discuss last weekend's quite giant $122mil opening for Shrek the Third (roughly $7mil more than Shrek 2). I ask this: Is this the quietest $100mil ever. Has anyone seen this movie? And if they have, have they even mentioned it. Nobody other than Dave Poland seems to be talking (and it ain't positive). My favourite part of the Quarterback article was this line "I compare Shrek to Pixar as Family Guy is to the Simpsons. The Shrek films appeal directly to the "Oh, I get jokes" crowd." As y'all know I sorta loathe that franchise.

Speaking of Dave Poland, he had lunch with Sarah Polley. As I say in the comments, I'm glad she's apparently done so well behind the camera because her on camera work reached it's nadir (but it wasn't as low as Marcia Gay Harden's, *snicker*).

Adam poses a head-scratcher. I can't for the life of me guess who he's talking about. I'll take a stab at it though... umm... oh! Lisa Scott-Lee?!?! No? Oh... damn. (Don't feel bad for not getting that. Nobody really gets Lisa Scott Lee. Except Lisa Scott Lee, of course.) There's a picture of Lisa to your right. She's knitting with giant needles and a ball of wool that is five sorts of "That's Huge!" Wait, why am I going off onto a Lisa Scott-Lee tangent or all possibly tangents.

And lastly, following on from all my harping about Grindhouse (it still tortures my soul to this very day, teehee) it was with hightened interest that I follow it's Cannes fate. I'd find it incredibly amusing if Death Proof (the now elongated segment of Grindhouse that is competing for the prestigious Palme d'Or) won an award. How about Best Actor for Kurt Russell? Or some wildly inventive special prize created by the jury as a means of, effectly, masturbating all over Quentin Tarantino. Some still don't like it much some apparently had a blast and if this quote is anything to go by (and, with Cannes audiences, you never know what's truthful and what's a big fat lie.)

Judging by the whoops of delight and loud cheering the new version received at its premiere on the Croisette this was a very good idea.

I can only hope it's true and that the Weinsteins and Village Roadshow get the fuck on with releasing these movies. Seriously. NOW.

UMA 2006 Profile: Best Actor

It's getting to the point of the year where I just want to get my yearly awards, The UMAs, over and done with. I figure, there comes a point where I just can't keep waiting to see a movie like Half Nelson (not yet released) or where I just can't be bothered to see virtual non-starters such as Venus until DVD many months away (Best Actor being the only category it would seem to have any play in). I don't ever intend to see Blood Diamond - if I didn't see it before the Oscar telecast, I sure as hell am not going to put myself through it now. The only other conceivable player that I can think of is Ken Watanabe (Letters from Iwo Jima) who I will hopefully get to see before I do my awards.

For now though I thought I'd just go through the candidates. Who's in play for me and who is not. I haven't decided upon a winner yet, but it's a race between several men who give the best work of their careers. To be honest though, a lot of the men in this race gave their best work this year.

Gabriel Byrne in Jindabyne
Byrne is an actor I have never cared for. Not in a Coen Bros. film (Miller's Crossing), not in ridiculous horror movies (Stigmata), and definitely not in that awful sitcom he had (I don't even care about what that hunk of junk was called), so it came as a big fat complete surprise to discover how excellent he was in Jindabyne. I know I shouldn't have been surprised, considering he was being directed by Master Ray Lawrence. Never underestimate the power of Ray Lawrence.

Sasha Baron Cohen in Borat! Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan
Some may say it's not so much of a performance, but more of a piece of performance art (I've seen very similar things performed in Federation Square on a Sunday arvo), but name me one of those performance artists (talented or not) who managed to get this much out of people. The mark of a great performance lies in an actor's believability, so say people. And, well, the proof of that is in the film. If there was a more believable performance to the people involved (while, admittedly, being unbelievable at the same time, if that makes sense) this year then I must have missed it.

Daniel Craig in Casino Royale
The most sexually masculine performance of the year, that's for sure. But, you know what? There's more to Craig's performance than just sex appeal. Don't get me wrong, it's not up to the dramatic front that several other contenders reached (that's more due to genre limits than because of Craig himself), but what he puts out is so rich and layered that it seems rude to just dismiss it as either a plain ol' action movie performance or, even worse, a James Bond performance.

Leonardo DiCaprio in The Departed
I've always liked DiCaprio. From his first great performance (that would be his Oscar-nominated turn in What's Eating Gilbert Grape) I was sad to watch him flounder in the late 1990s after Titanic, but watching his reassurgance has been a delight. I didn't too much care for Gangs of New York, but DiCaprio's two subsequence Scorsese features have presented us with riches far beyond his promises back in the early 1990s. Oozing masculinity like nobody could have forseen, DiCaprio takes the role of a the cop in deep you-know-what and makes it edgy and exciting.

Aaron Eckhart in Thank You for Smoking
Yes, he's a sleazebag, but a sexy forget-the-buttons-i'll-just-rip-you-shirt-off sleazebag. That I was utterly under Eckhart's spell is a testaent to Eckhart himself and not, I presume, writer/director Jason Reitman. The highest compliment I can pay him is that I'd probably become an even bigger smoker* if I had Eckhart giving me lectures all day about how they're not as bad as the "good guys" say, despite the fact that I know full well how bad they really are.

* Don't look at me like that! I haven't touched the filthy things in over two month, I swear!

Hugh Jackman in The Fountain
My beloved reaches (unexpected, to some) untapped depth and wealth of character in Darren Aronofsky's The Fountain. Jackman is asked to make three seperate characters believable, compelling and emotionally attached. Others have done that, but how many can claim to have done it with three characters stretched over 1000 years? Taking the basic elements of a conquistador, a brain surgeon and a Buddhist space traveller, Jackman tunes into each one with the precission of said surgeon with a scalpal. He knows where to go and does it with a steady hand. The final product is simply amazing. Jackman also gets bonus points for being sublimely smooth in The Prestige.

Shane Jacobson in Kenny
The character of Kenny is one of those that has now instantly gone into the lore of Australian film. The reasons are quite simple. He's a lovable hard-working Aussie battler (the type that we love, apparently, oh so much). But the reason I liked him and the movie itself, was because Jacobson (with the help of co-writer and director, Clayton Jacobson) filled the character of Kenny with just enough good and bad to make him believable and endearing. Kenny is a man just going through life, dealing with things as they come. From the way he tries to charm a lady to the way he unclogs a terribly unappealing portaloo, he's truthful and funny in the best possible way.

Jude Law in Breaking and Entering
Law's character doesn't have any of the factors that helped make many of the other performances this year special. He's not playing a famous person, he doesn't yell alot, he isn't a sci-fi parable, or a sexy charmer. No, he plays an ordinary simple man. His problems seem so small and minute compared to the issues at play in the other films. But why should that be held against him? Law puts in his best-ever work as a man going through a sort-of midlife crisis because (I guess) he's bored and a midlife crisis feels like a good way to go. He is the real threat to take the crown from the more obvious/flashy/popular choices.

Heath Ledger in Candy
After giving the best male performance of the decade so far (in the UMA winning Brokeback Mountain, duh), Ledger continues his fine form playing a drug addict. The film wasn't the greatest, but what Ledger (and co-star Abbie Cornish) brought to the table was the irresistable rock-star meets down-and-out loser look that you associate with these characters. Sure, he's too pretty to be a drug addict (as is Cornish), but you can believe that he thinks he's the greatest (well, until it all turns to the crapper).

Clive Owen in Children of Men
This is a hard one to discuss. It's one of those performances that works in the grand scheme of the movie, yet is hard to define outside of those surroundings. There's nothing that screams with a big neon signs LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT ME!, yet when I think back over it, I can't put a finger to anything that was done wrong. I'm almost keen to say these are the best sort of performances (it works on the same lines as Jude Law's actually) because it's as good as the film that encompasses it and it never tries to be better because the actor knows it doesn't have to be. Am I making sense?

Forest Whitaker in The Last King of Scotland
In any other movie Whitaker would be right up there with a chance, but considering I thought The Last King of Scotland was a retched horrible disaster of a manipulation movie, Whitaker is probably going to be an unfortunate casualty. Whitaker was good, but my affection for it is constantly brought back down by my disgust and contempt for the movie. He'd be riveting if everything else around him wasn't being engulfed by the vile flames of hell sprouting up around him.

Patrick Wilson in Little Children and Hard Candy
Two performances with many similarities (men with hidden secrets), yet both equally amazing. You can, scarily I might add, believe how an underage girl could fall for his charms in the revenge fantasy Hard Candy while also believing, not as scarily thankfully, why he would be the drooling fantasy loverboy of suburbia in Little Children. And on neither occasion does Wilson let his leading ladies (Kate Winslet and Ellen Paige respectively) get away with all the best work. He's more than willing to steal some limelight for himself.

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Over the next couple of weeks I'll be doing some more of these. Culminating in the 2006 UMA Awards. But, who knows, when I will actually get around to them. There are certain movies that I feel I must see beforehand and, well, y'all know how those things are.

Hard pill to swallow

So, I just watched Hard Candy. Touch watch, I must say. Very interesting though, and well made I think. It's clearly just another in a line of non-traditional horror movies from 2006. For people who aren't aware of what this movie, I won't spoil it (although, it's very confronting), but those who have, y'all know what I mean when I say that scene was one of the most uncomfortable moments all year. The moments leading up to it were just... cover-the-eyes scary. I gotta say that, as much as I thought she was great, Helen Mirren is all but out of my top 5 actresses of the year now that I've seen Ellen Page in this movie. What a knockout! So, yeah, Hard Candy? I can't exactly say it was a great watch, but it was executed with fine skill and I think it's definitely a film that, if you think you can stomach it, is one that you should seek it - if for no other reason than to be able to say you've seen it when in 20 years time it's seen as one of those films that sits notoriously on the bottom shelf at Blockbuster. B-

LOL! EDIT! The Mother came home and saw me watching one of the featurettes on the DVD and she was all "Oh heavens, what on earth is this?" and I told her and she decided to sit down and watch the movie and just now I walked out of my room and she said she "loved" the movie. Like... huh? That's hilarious. The Mother has strange tastes. She actually said "Oh you do bring home some odd movies sometimes" and then she watches them and she likes them. Unless they have subtitles. The Mother gets a headache from reading them so fast. The end.

DVD Update

As part of my experiment with new DVD service Quickflix, I'm being sent What Have I Done To Deserve This? and Hard Candy as I type this. That's so much better than freakin' BigPond. Buh-bye BigPond. It's been nice knowin' ya. You were there for me in the beginning but after a while I just grew tired of you. Like Renee Zellweger!

At last! A critics group thinking for themselves

Let us all praise Austin, Texas!

They gave Best Actress to Ellen Page for Hard Candy (the first critics group in all of America to not give their prize to Helen Mirren), Best Actor to Leonardo DiCaprio, Original Screenplay for Pan's Labyrinth, Alfonso Cuaron winning Best Director and Best Adapted Screenplay for Children of Men, This Film is Not Yet Rated for Best Documentary (that's a first too), Brick for Best First Feature, A Scanner Darkly for Best Picture and their Top 10 includes Brick, The Fountain and The Prestige!

Austin is my favourite critics group now. It's about time somebody stopped with the ubiquitous Forest Whitaker/Helen Mirren stuff. I doubt by the time I get to give out the UMAs that Helen Mirren will even be in my top 5! There's already at least two above her, possibly three - I'm still not sure who I prefer out of Mirren or Laura Linney (for Jindabyne).

Hmm. Oh well.