And Now For Something You've Probably Already Heard!

That new Britney Spears video clip? WOW! It. Is. Terrible. I... I am almost without any words, but naturally I can still articulate an insult.

Lazy, Boring, Unsexy and Pointless come to mind as apt adjectives. Britney does nothing in the entire video except walk around a pole. I think the walking was meant to be sexy, but it wasn't. Not to mention the outfit is fug-central. Where's the dancing? Or some form of spirit. I reckon they were going for a "Slave 4 U" vibe, but missed by about forty footy fields. And if Spears was trying to be a stripper or whatever then I don't think she quite has the job requirements.

The camera work appears to be trying for a cool arty effect but comes off as blurry and distracting. Constant switches between black and white and colour and then sepia(?) just make for a discombobulating effort.

Lastly I come to the most bizarre aspect of the video. And it's the blonde Britney. There are a couple of bits, including at the very start, where Britney isn't playing the dark-haired pole dancer but is a blonde-haired gal at the bar. I have no idea why. It's like they were outtakes from a discarded original video. They don't fit into the video in any way and when they are their she's just looking vacant.

It's a very confusing and very poor effort if you ask me, much akin to the "Song 4 Mutya" video. Not at all surprising, though. Still, the song is great.

Gimme More Shoes!

Not the theme song to the upcoming Sex and the City film, but actually a mashup between Britney Spears' "Gimme More" and Kelly's "Shoes". It's sort of amazing.

It's Britney, Bitch!

I've never been a huge fan of Britney Spears. For every amazing "Toxic" or "Slave 4 U" there's a terrible "Outrageous" or "I'm Not a Girl, Not Yet a Woman" and her early years are too bubblegum for me (says the man who just last week was addicted to Aqua and Bardot) and am not a fan of her albums give or take the occasional great single choice ("Overprotected" and the aforementioned "Toxic" and "Slave 4 U"). Needless to say I haven't been one of the people foaming at the mouth of new Britney tracks - especially when every day there are new pictures of her abandoning her children (and when she has them she's dangling cigarettes in their faces).

But, two tracks leaked today, which you surely have already heard. If not, "Gimme More" is below. "Gimme More" is the good one. "Cold as Fire" is the other (you can find it withing a couple of clicks on the net, surely) and it is the one that's not good. If "Gimme More" is the lead single as they say then, depending on the rest of the album, I guess they could be much worse (like, for instance, "Cold As Fire").

It's interesting to see Britney go back to dancier club-oriented music when she's trying to make a comeback because while the rest of the world likes it America is shit scared of it (see how shitty Madonna's Confessions album did compared to the rest of the world). We'll see if her name can get it over the boundary and into mainstream.



I do love the "It's Britney, bitch!" part at the start. Don't you?