January 4, 2006

"I would've looked like a fugly slag..." + Chicken Little

Okay, so I've talked about We Can Be Heroes before but I'd never actually seen the entire series (6 episodes) until now. And it basically just confirmed to me that the program written, created and acted by Chris Lilley is the funniest thing to come out of Australia since the first season of Kath & Kim 4 years ago. It is a pisser.

Quick overview: We Can Be Heroes: Finding the Australian of the Year is a mocumentary tv series that follows 5 contenders (one from five different states of Australia) on their quest to become the Australian of the year. There is:

Phil - the policeman who saved a bunch of kids from a flying jumping castle.
Pat - a woman with one leg shorter than the other who's goal is to roll on her side from Perth to Uluru.
Ricky Wong - a Physics students who secretly joins a Chinese theatre group's production of "Indigeridoo", a musical about the plight of aboriginal Australians. Daniel - A farmboy who - in a world first - is donating one of his eardrums to his deaf twin brother (also played by Lilley)

and last but definitely not least, Ja'mie (pronounced Ja-may) King - A 16-year-old school girl who sponsors 85 African children.

It is so bloody hilarious. But let's be honest - the show wouldn't be half as good if it wasn't for Lilley's creation of one of the all-time (yes, ALL-TIME) funniest characters for television: JA'MIE KING! In her own words, she is "totally fucking hot" and so hilarious. Let me quote Ja'mie during one of her school debates. The topic? Why girls at her school should be allowed to wear makeup.

"As third speaker, I would like to sum up why Hillford Girls should wear makeup. First of all, Allison, I would like to rebut what you said. Without makeup girls look natural. That's crap. They don't. Seriously, think about it. When I was in year seven I had, like, nine pimples. Okay? Nine pimples meant that when I was at the station, boys thought I was fugly. Seriously, without makeup I would've looked like a fugly slag. What about Penny? Penny in year seven had those really serious burns. If she didn't wear lots of makeup she would've looked so hidious. Seriously, once I saw her getting changed in the gym and I saw her bum and it's like totally burnt and it's really really ugly"

She is so hilarious. Like, when one of her African sponsor kids comes to Australia illegally and gets put into a detention centre, Somali (the girl) sends Ja'mie a letter saying she would like to meet her and she and her friends have a hilariously racist conversation about how she's probably into voodoo "omigod, I totally had a pain in my arse this morning. Ow, I can totally feel it now!" and how "this letter totally smells. Smell it. SMELL IT. It's totally disgusting". And she talks about how doing the 40-hour-family twice a week for her sponsor kids helps her lose weight because "Two days a week without food keeps me looking hot." Or how about when she's telling her mother about how 84 of her sponsor kids have been killed in a freak flood and she doesn't think he mother's listening to goes on a tyrade and calls her "a totally fat fucking bitch. You lazy fucking slag. I fucking hate you. I never liked you you fugly bitch".

Or, when she gives a lecture to her school about how they're all lazy slag's for not donating money to World Vision and then does a roleplay with her friends and decides that not giving up food to become skinny so her friend can pick up chicks is greedy.

And then when she misses out on being Australian of the Year she's all "I'm totally the most compassionate person here!", Somali responds "I'm sorry you lost" and Ja'mie's reply? "You don't have to be a sarcastic bitch about it!" and storms off.

Ja'mie has become a cultural ICON in Australia recently because she's so popular. She will show up at awards ceremony's and events and be all "omigod, I totally want to meet Anthony Callea!"

The even funnier thing is some people thought the program was REAL and wrote in letters complaining that none of these people deserved it except for Pat because they were all such horrible people. And when "Ja'mie" appeared on the radio complaining about how "i got home from school and my mother hadn't even made my bed. Was a fucking slag" people rang in and verbally abused her telling her she is what's wrong with our country. LOL indeed.

And then there is Ricky Wong (yes, Chris Lilley playing an Asian man!) - the Chinese physics student who joins a Chinest Theatre group and stars in a Chinese version of "The Boy From Oz" and are now attempting an original musical based on the aboriginal ancestors of Australia. Such musical insights as

"Aborigine me
Aborigine you
We're not just the people
Who eat kangaroo!"

However, the show isn't all laughs. There is actually a very sad bit in the last two episodes involving one of the characters that is really moving.

Anyway, can't wait for Lilley's next endeavor. A mockumentary about a high school drama teacher who he created for the tv series Big Bite a few years ago. He's funny. Brilliant. A

I also saw Chicken Little (dir. Dindal) last night. I actually didn't mind it. I thought it was waaay better than I was anticipating (I was expecting around what Nathaniel gave it) but it wasn't that bad. I liked the character animation and some of the characters were legitimately funny (Runt of the Litter and Turkey Lurkey in particular). Loved some of the jokes like the mayor who reads everything he says off of cue-cards. But there were major issues. The movie is barely 80 minutes long and it still feels stretched out (the baseball sequence was nothing) and the really overlt sentimentality was really annoying. It wasn't filled filled to the brim with pop culture stuff (like Shrek and Shrek 2) like Nat would have me believe. And it was just a kids movie. Anyway, it wasn't great, but it wasn't horrible either. A perfectly acceptable waste of 90minutes in a cinema with some popcorn and coke. C+

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