June 22, 2006

Funny HAH HAH!

I was a bit bored and I felt myself in a chucklesome mood (I just rewatched The Producers) and thought I'd read my favourite film review ever. Odd, perhaps. But, when you read it I hope you'll agree. It's Cranky Critic's review of Ballistic: Ecks Vs. Sever.

That movie is truly awful, and that review is the best thing about it! I just think that review is hilarious. I can never read it enough.

One of the reasons that critics exist is to summarize films, in a clear and concise manner, so that you can make an educated decision as to whether or not to spend your hard earned cash on a ticket. So, in our absolutely crystal clear and concise manner: Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever lkoit lli oine poiw. Quoe plaou flmk all twhs. Ee zajoxi lkwn mmoxin. Explosions? llzeni! Car chases? llzeni! Strong violence? llzeni! A story that makes no sense whatsoever? llzeni!! llzeni!! A man who so loves his son that he pumps him full of a prototype bio-mechanical weapon? llzeni!!

Brilliant. And he doesn't even go into the absurdity of the film's TITLE (Ecks and Sever don't actually fight one another. They in fact team up to defeat the bad guy).

God that movie was bad. I actually fell asleep for a minute or so through it. Although who knows because it moves from one thing to another so quickly. Aagh. Awful.


RC said...

writing a review for a bad movie is much more fun then writing a review of a good film...or a "just slightly above average film."

--RC of strangeculture.blogspot.com

Kamikaze Camel said...

ugh, the movies that you really have no feelings towards are the worst. Because it's not good enough to praise anything but it's not bad enough to rip it to shreds.

I feel bad writing reviews for bad movies, but then it also makes me really happy because they deserve it.